November 30th, 2007
Can I claim to have discovered Conan too?

Why not, right? I sure know how to pick 'em! He is paying not only his writing staff but everyone in production on his show for the foreseeable future. That comes to about 80 employees. Thankfully this isn't five years ago or he'd have to pay the masturbating bear. They have very high rates.
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November 29th, 2007
This is how hip I am:

I finally joined Facebook. So I could play Scrabulous.

P.S. That place scares me! It's like high school only more confusing!
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November 27th, 2007
New Math

I was thinking today that a couple of my friends are turning 40 soon (I keep much, much older friends than I am) but they don't seem like what I imagine 40 to be. So I've figured it all out:

40 is the new 30
30 is the new 20
20 is the new 16
16 is the new 24
24 is the new 29
29 is the old 30

I hope that helps!
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November 21st, 2007
He's like a less annoying Matthew Mcaughneheyhey

Alright so I'm just going to admit it and get it out there. I watched the entire season of The Bachelor. I realize that most of you think I've already sunk this low, but I have actually never watched more than a few minutes of it before this. The thing is, this bachelor was different. I swear! And in case you haven't heard, when it came to the end and he had to choose between two women, he didn't choose EITHER! What?? It was CRAZY! You'll have to trust me on that. He said he couldn't because he was dating them both at once and never got to really be focused on one, so he was so confused about how he felt that committing to either would have been dishonest. No other bachelor has ever been that honest!! I told you he was different!!

Here is my theory: He is so good looking that his body rejected anyone less than supermodel status. If he came close to a less than perfect body type his body would go into reject mode. This is his body: "Ack! You are not a perfect specimen! I cannot spend anymore time on this matter!" (His body talks like a robot.) Do you get it now? This ended up causing him to reject them both. I told Brett this and he said, "I had no idea you were in love with the bachelor this whole time." I told him I'm not in love, it's just a theory! An excellent theory! He told me I'm not allowed to watch it alone anymore. The season's over, so that won't be an issue.
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November 16th, 2007
Tomorrow I meet google.

Last night I went to a screening of Paul Thomas Anderson's new movie, There Will Be Blood. I won't give anything away, but I had a lot of problems with it. I don't know if we're going to make it. We have our issues and I don't know how we're going to get past them. A fact that PTA is VERY upset about right now. But he and Maya Rudolph are just going to have to deal with it.

The best part of the evening was when my friend pointed out that Judd Apatow was right behind us. Well, less the pointing out, and more the fact of. Long time readers of my blog will remember that I discovered him! So it was very exciting to see him. And then it turned out that he was moderating the Q&A with PTA and Daniel Day Lewis (DDL). Judd Apatow was hilarious and great, even though he didn't seem to realize that it was going on way too long (over an hour) and DDL was over it after minute 2. The first thing Judd Apatow said was how amazing the movie was, how great DDL was, so the first thing he wanted to ask was, "Which did you like more, Knocked Up or Superbad?" When DDL just kind of smirked and didn't say anything (for a lllong beat) Judd Apatow said, "I'll send you the DVDs."

This has turned into a review for my little prodigy! No surprise, he gets 5 stars.
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November 14th, 2007
I am easy.

If you have a stutter, I love you. It's that simple.
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November 13th, 2007
I am the future.

I think now is a good time to discuss the fact that I have discovered a lot of things before they became huge. A lot of things were out there, being unhuge, I came to know and love them and then they became big hits. For some reason I never get the credit. Here is the list of things I discovered:

1. Judd Apatow. So now you see how ridiculous this is. Ridiculous and TRUE. I first discovered Judd Apatow when I watched The Ben Stiller show. So, after he had his first pilot on the air, but before anyone ELSE (besides his agent and his mother) cared! Anyway, for reasons I can't explain I decided to give him credit for that show (which I love and continue to love). And now look at him! All the comedy nerds want to be him. Only *I* wanted to be him first! Haha! Take that comedy nerds! Bet you feel silly now.

2. Google. Totally. When I was a temp, people in my office were using netscape and yahoo for searching for things and I would say, "I prefer google." And the people? They would look at me like I was crazy. "Google??" they would say, suspiciously. Now there's a verb for it! Why am I so awesome??

3. Hello Kitty. The resurgence of it, anyway. I'm emotionally 12 and I guess so are a lot of other people. Only they didn't realize it until AFTER I did!

4. Wes Anderson. I was obsessed with Bottle Rocket when no one knew that movie existed! Granted, most people still don't like that movie and feel Rushmore was one of, if not his best movie. But I got to Wes Anderson so early I didn't even like Rushmore! Ha! Look, let's ignore that last part. I want to like it.

And I don't even want to get into all the things I've discovered that haven't caught on yet, because it WILL catch on and I don't want to be the kind of person that says, "I told you so!"

Do I seem punchy? I ate a LOT of brownies today. A LOT.
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November 12th, 2007
Brett was also there, although not as my child.

I took Harper to picket today as it was "take your kid" day. She spent the time we were there "reading" her Dr. Seuss book and pointing at a dog. Still, someday I can tell her she did something good for writers.


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November 11th, 2007
Report from the Harper line.

Harper likes to use her hands to communicate more than she likes to use words. I would say "sign" but for the most part these are more things she's picked up from watching us communicate with our hands rather than actual sign language. I love that she is communicating with us except that her sign for "I love you" looks a lot like "goodbye" or "the trash is stinky". The latter of which she finds hilarious. So now I can't tell if she's telling me she loves me, is going to leave me, or that I stink. The truth is, I always choose to believe she's telling me she loves me, even if we're passing a garbage can or I haven't brushed my teeth yet. (My mouth always smells like roses.) (Stinky roses.) (Goodbye.) (I love you.)
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November 10th, 2007
Once more with (even more) feeling!

This is the best article I've seen on the strike, and says it far better than I have. From EW: Strike: Why the writers are right.
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November 8th, 2007
I was chanting in my head. A little.

I guess I must have picked the most mellow gate of all the studios to picket at today. I already felt a little bit out of my element when I signed the sign in sheet and noticed that under "project" all the writers at my location were from ER and Smallville. I had to stop myself from writing under project: "Getting my 15 month old to eat vegetables".

They were all walking together talking amongst themselves quietly. I befriended one other lone writer and we walked in circles for an hour talking. When a studio tour bus made its way into the studio I had to stop myself from apologizing that I was in its way. Never mind that the ONLY reason we are there is to slow things down. I said to my new friend, "I'm pretty sure that's not the response I'm supposed to be giving right now." He said, "Why? What'd ya do?" "Smiled meekly." He said, "No, that's about right." I like that guy.

All other videos I've seen of the strike have people chanting loudly, cars honking, general rabble rousing. If I want some more excitement next time I'll pick a gate that's not at the end of a dead end street in a residential neighborhood.
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November 7th, 2007
Let's have a little levity here.

Harper was one of the munchkins from the lollipop guild for Halloween.


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November 7th, 2007
Strike talk strike talk, funnnn!

I guess it's boring to keep posting about the strike, but it's what's on my mind right now. I am going to start picketing while Harper is napping although I am sick today so I can't. But I keep hearing these, "rich, greedy writers" comments from people. I should be the poster child for the WGA. Haven't worked in a year! Hello! This is not uncommon, and in fact very common! Why is it that people seem to understand that something like 95% of the actors in SAG aren't working but they assume writers are all rich? It's because we smell like money, isn't it? I TOLD them when I joined the guild I didn't want to wear that money scented perfume but they insisted. Now look where it's got us.
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November 5th, 2007
A serious post, watch out!

So my guild, the WGA, is on strike. I haven't gotten paid for writing in over a year; partly because I've taken myself out of the game by caring for a baby, but also because no one has beaten down my door during that time begging for me to write for them. (What is no one's problem?) But I'm feeling a little defensive about the strike as the studios we are striking against have painted us as rich, greedy babies. Me no like that (I just threw some gold coins around)!

The average wga member makes $5,000/yr. (I'm not average! yay!) Just like if SAG struck, most of the actors affected would not be crying in their jacuzzis behind their gated mansions, the same is true for writers.

Here is what we are asking for:

1. We are asking for 8 CENTS from dvd sales instead of 4. Not percent. CENTS. The studios make $15.

2. The studios want to show movies and tv shows on the internet without paying the writers a penny. Not 8. Not even four of them. Nothin'.

I have found since being a member that writers are crapped on more than I had imagined. We are expected to pitch ideas for free (something that doesn't happen when I write promos or other advertising), we are often rewritten without thought or consideration, in general just looked at as dispensable. This is crazy considering there would be no film, no tv show without a writer. And the fact that these demands are not being considered is, in my opinion, disgusting.

It's a sucky time for many people and I wanted to put in my TWO cents in defense of the guild.


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November 1st, 2007
They came complete with puns!

I should probably be posting about the inevitable WGA strike since I am, in theory, a writer, but nobody comes here for things like that. They come here for bunny humor, right? Well, lucky for you, I have some! It was time for us to get new checks and I was asked to choose which ones we got. It was no contest. The only problem is that it makes me want to write checks. Lotsa them.

SNOW BUNNY


ATTILA THE BUN


BAD TO THE BUN


If anyone needs a couple dollars I would be happy to give it to you. On one of these bad boys.
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