May 30th, 2006
baby come back!

Dear Sleep,

What's up? We used to be BFF right? What happened? Every night you want to hang out but then I wake up at 4 AM and realize you've totally ditched me. I wait around for a little while but I figure out pretty quickly that you're just gone and you're not coming back until the next night. What'd I do? Can we work this out somehow? Remember the days when we would hang out all the time and I was a little worried I had some kind of disease or was a cat? I didn't mind that! Don't worry about coming on too strong, okay? If you feel you want to stay around awhile I much prefer that to these brief visits. I won't think you're clingy, don't be embarrassed. Just come back soon.

Thanks,

Your BFF 4eva

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May 28th, 2006
I love the Fonz!

I just saw an interview with Henry Winkler. He said, "I know that if I ever met Jack Bauer he would take care of me. I want his autograph. I really do. I want to meet Jack. I hate Tuesdays because it's so far away from Mondays when 24 is on."

My favorite part is that he doesn't want to meet Kiefer, he wants to meet Jack. Me too!
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May 26th, 2006

I think I lost my marbles there for a little bit, but I think they may be back where they belong. I finally got a lead on a home for a kitten. A friend of a friend of a friend had a friend who really wanted a small kitten. I began throwing a party for the friend of the friend of the friend and told her we were now best friends. Then two days went by. No word. I began what can only be described as quiet stalking. Two emails and a phone call. Maybe she works late, I reasoned. Maybe she doesn't check email, I hoped. I started making ALL KINDS OF EXCUSES FOR THIS WOMAN. Finally I couldn't defend her. I started referring to her as "Erin O'Donnelly the kitten tease." (Names have been changed.) Finally she called. She sounded a little irritated but I chose to ignore it. Mostly. She said she would call this person, give them my number and she would call me to make arrangements to see said kitten. I said fine. ERIN'S FRIEND HAS STILL NOT CALLED. But I'm fine with this. I've come to the conclusion that you know what, not only is it okay if they're still here in two months, I WANT them here. Who am I kidding? And Brett doesn't like to admit it, but he wants them here too. We'll just become one of those families that has so many cats they're too embarrassed to say how many they have when people ask. And we won't move until we buy in 12 years. And our daughter will feel like she's permanently in a Nature episode about cats. Or an Animal Rescue episode about "crazy" people who have too many cats. And we'll GET BY. Because THAT'S WHAT WE DO.

Marbles are in place, and that's all that matters.
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May 24th, 2006
You'll never go down the drain!

Holy crap I love Mr. Rogers. I think you'd have to have the heart of a snake not to. This Senator's snake heart gets transformed before our very eyes. Mr. Rogers gets PBS funding of $20 million dollars by quoting his song that ends, "That a girl may be some day a lady, and a boy may be someday a man." I can't believe I'm saying this, but I don't think even Jack Bauer could have accomplished that.
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May 23rd, 2006
Oh the long wait until January 2007!

In honor of 24's season ending last night, and the hollow place its absence will leave in my heart and TiVo, I now present you with the top 10 Jack Bauerisms as reported on this website. Let me tell you, if there was ever a Wentworth Millerisms websites it would just talk about which pastels are right for Spring. But let's not sully ourselves with that. Here is the list (#5 & 7 are my favorites):

1 Only Jack Bauer can fly a plane from the luggage compartment.
2 The city of Los Angeles once named a street after Jack Bauer in gratitude for his saving the city several times. They had to rename it after people kept dying when they tried to cross the street. No one crosses Jack Bauer and lives.
3 If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.

4 If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12".

5 Passed out, surrounded by terrorists and nerve gas, and handcuffed to a table leg, Jack Bauer laughed to himself and said, "I have them right where I want them."

6 Jack Bauers calender goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.

7 Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.

8 Once, someone tried to tell Jack Bauer a "knock knock" joke. Jack Bauer found out who was there, who they worked for, and where the goddamned bomb was.

9 Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location.

10 If Jack Bauer's gun jams, it's because he wanted to beat you with it.
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May 22nd, 2006

Arnie posted this in his blog,but I am too computer retarded to ensure that I would link it right to this entry so instead I will cut and paste it. But you should look at his blog anyway because it's great. I and the masses who google him and end up here agree.

This is what it said (partially):
At the Gap, I noticed that Dad was looking at socks next to Wentworth Miller, of TV's Prison Break.

GAP Worker: Yeah, he comes in here most mornings. If you ask me, I'd be much more excited if Jack Bauer came into the store.

END OF ARNIE'S ENTRY!!!

WHAT? EVERY morning?! Okay, that does it. I have a growing dislike, bordering on hatred (if I were to admit I feel such things) for this Wentworth Miller. He is playing a bad ass and he could not be a waspier, stick up his butt, whitey mcwhite non bad ass if he wanted to be. In fact if they said to him, "PLEASE act like a stuffed shirt guy who watches and relates to Frasier" I bet he couldn't even do it because he's that bad an actor!! The fact that he went to Princeton and shops at the Gap EVERY morning only proves my point more. (Again, sorry Justin.) Who shops at the Gap EVERY morning?! What on earth does he need there that he can't just get and not go back?! I'll tell you what he's doing! He's soaking up the atmosphere! It's one place he feels the most comfortable! And i'm supposed to believe he not only is involved in a prison break but orchestrated the whole thing?!!

Also, of course that Gap worker would be more excited if Jack bauer was coming there, but Jack BAUER is busy getting wasted at 9 in the morning falling off bar stools and knocking over Christmas trees for fun! He isn't shopping at the Gap!

I'm 7 1/2 months pregnant. This is exactly how I'm supposed to be feeling right now.

Ahem. Does anyone want to adopt some kittens? Hold on, you haven't seen them yet.



DP


DC


Lady


Seriously if you know anyone remotely near LA (and that could be Kansas at this point) who wants kittens please tell them to contact me. Unless it's Wentworth Miller. These kittens are from Compton. They have nothing in common with him.
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May 22nd, 2006

Catster is really thoughtful. Everyone else but us forgot Dr. Schwartz's birthday but I got this email today from Catster:

Dear Dr. Marlena Evans Schwartz,

Meow meow!

We want to wish you a very Happy Birthday full of love and joy and purring. We are thrilled to be able to celebrate it with you! Dr. Marlena Evans Schwartz will be profiled today with other birthday kitties on Catster's special Birthday Stroll.

How thoughtful! I won't tell Sir Winston Greggory and Gracie as it's their birthday too but we haven't bothered to put them up on Catster. We're pretty much over them.*

*totes kidding!

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May 19th, 2006

A few months ago I saw this early Beatles documentary that was a riveting, fascinating look not only into the Beatles but into the onset of fame and celebrity. The camera followed them on their first US tour when they did Ed Sullivan and they were still so excited to see themselves on television. They were watching themselves and laughing at the things they said in interviews as well as the interviews themselves as they were being shot. It was so crazy to know that they were going to be the biggest things since Jesus (well you know, John and I differ. I think Jesus was adorable, but not as huge as them) and to see them as kids just eating it all up. And then towards the end of the tour they're already sort of used to it, and they had the REST of their lives to live like that.

And now I hear all sorts of things about Paul and his ego and I think I'd just like to think of him as that kid who couldn't believe they were on TV. And besides, who's going to love him when he turns 64 in a month?!! Sorry, at first I was making fun of the thought of anyone making that joke and then I made it.
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May 18th, 2006

I guess I have been too consumed with other things to post here, so for my masses of fans who want to catch up on television and cat related items, I apologize. Here is an update:

We still have four kittens to adopt out! They're going to an adoption place on the weekend where strangers can take them as their very own, but come on people, just adopt them already.

I love the Amazing Race and I love the so called hippies who won. They are adorable and sweet and won in the sweetest life affirming way possible. Hey, they're hippies I'm allowed to put it that way. I actually don't even really think they are hippies but everyone calls them that, so I'll be a sheep.

Huff is the best show on TV. Sorry, the best non Jack Bauer show on TV. You non kitten adopting, non Huff watching people are really missing out on some adorable kittens and great television.

I'd like to leave you with a picture of our cat Greg sleeping with his tongue out but I have to wait for Brett to make it blog viewable. So, just imagine it for your own amusement.
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May 9th, 2006
Doesn't anyone want to adopt some adorable kittens?!

I am bored of myself so I've had nothing to post but I consider it a duty to my reader(s? possibly) to tell you under no circumstances should you see Art School Confidential. It is terrrrrrrible. It is however lovely to go to a movie and find out your companion has no compulsions about leaving a movie early and in fact suggests it first. What a great quality in a human. Then of course I being the cheap one asked the cashier if we could get our money back. I should note that I feel like being pregnant should get me more things than it has. Every time I've tried to use it, it hasn't worked. Granted I've only "used" it by existing, but I feel the presence of a pregnant lady should inspire guilt or affection depending on the situation and it hasn't as far as I can tell. Anyway I gave him a sad face like the movie had upset my unborn child and he said, "Sorry we only give refunds if you leave in the first fifteen minutes." Well who is going to leave a movie in the first fifteen minutes? He might as well have said "We don't give refunds at all." Because what kind of person is going to drive down to a theatre, park and then leave after fifteen minutes? A very easily agitated impatient one, that's who. Whatever.

Then we went to sushi and I noticed Veronica from Road Rules and more notably Real World/Road Rules Challenge sitting near us. Not only do I wish I didn't know who she was I also wish I didn't realize that I have seen her in three different locations over a period of probably 5 years. Two times when I was just visiting. I don't like to think of us as being unconciously connected in any way, but I'm from California, so I do think that. It's upsetting, she's the meanest most shallow of all those girls. Or at least in the top five. I hope she's not some reflection of me!

Excuse me, I have to go watch the Real Housewives of the OC reunion show now.
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May 3rd, 2006

It's been awhile so i feel like I should update this. Let's see...

I was going to write a movie with a rodeo as the backdrop and then apparently they ran out of money to make it so I'm not going to. It's for the best because I don't believe in rodeos and I was trying to think of how I was going to write a rodeo movie without animals. Either that or add a rodeo animal activist into the plot, either way, I don't think they would have appreciated it.

Speaking of Keifer Sutherland, did you know that in the period of time when Hollywood rejected him from its fickle womb he did the rodeo circuit for two years? I continue to love Jack Bauer more than Keifer. But I really really love Jack Bauer.

Speaking of wombs, as most of you know I am preggers. Noticeably so. So when I went to look at an apartment and the woman said, "Is this for you and your boyfriend?" I have to say, I was quite insulted. The woman basically called my baby a bastard. Wait, is a lady baby a bastard? Maybe she just called me a slut, either way I didn't like it.

Speaking of sluts, no actually, I think I'm done.

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